Confessions From Your Fat Friend by Paige Fieldsted

Author:Paige Fieldsted [Fieldsted, Paige]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Paige Fieldsted

Confession 14 — I Don’t Want to Listen to You Complain About Being Fat

I swear to God, if one more person who wears single-digit sized clothing tells me they are fat, I will literally strangle someone. If you can wear a skirt that would fit on one of my thighs, you are not fat. If you have a mostly flat stomach, you are not fat. If you don’t have to shop at specialty stores to find your size, you’re not fat. If you are not fatter than me, I don’t want to listen to you complain about how fat you are.

Until you know what it’s like to repeatedly rub holes in the thighs of your pants, to get chafing in between or underneath fat rolls, to not be able to ride certain rides at an amusement park, to need a seat belt extender on an airplane or not fit in most patio chairs, I just don’t want to hear it.

You are not fat just because you ate a cookie. You are not fat just because you gained five pounds. You are not fat just because maybe it’s that time of the month and your pants are a little tight. You are not fat just because you aren’t a size zero. I don’t want to have to reassure you over and over again that you are not fat, when really I just want to cry because if you think you’re fat, then I must be disgusting.

There have been times when I listened to a friend or family member ramble on and on about how fat they are (despite my best reassurances that they are not) and then gone somewhere by myself and cried because I would kill to be their version of “fat.” There have been times when listening to people much skinnier than me whine about being fat that I have wanted to lift up my shirt and say, “You are not fat. This is fat.”

I hate that the word fat is used to sum up all the problems we have with our bodies and our confidence. I hate that unless you have the body of a Victoria’s Secret model, you’ve likely been called fat by a bully at some point in your life. I hate it when you commandeer a word that actually describes my body to describe your negative feelings about yourself, i.e., “I feel so fat today.” Fat isn’t a feeling. It’s an actual adjective used to describe how my body looks.

I know, I know, body image issues and self-esteem struggles aren’t reserved solely for fat people. I know people of all sizes suffer from body dysmorphia and/or eating disorders. Bodies of all sizes are subjected to the constant bombardment of diet culture and perfectly photoshopped images that make us feel like we are never quite enough. I imagine people of all sizes get upset when they gain weight or when their pants are a little tight after a few days of eating too much. People of all sizes measure their worth based on what the scale says and what size jeans they wear.

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